I was at Delhi airport, waiting for my car. It had been four years since I left my family, my home, my city, my country. I did it all for one person because I couldn't bear to face her. The pain I felt when I saw her with someone else was still fresh in my heart. It was suffocating and unbearable.
Maybe she was married now and had beautiful children.
My inner voice mocked me. It always worked against me, but the thought of her as someone else’s wife was too much to bear. No, I couldn't think like that.
The airport was buzzing with activity, but I felt detached from it all. Memories of the past flooded my mind, memories of her. I remembered the way she used to laugh, her eyes sparkling with joy. I remembered the warmth of her touch, the comfort of her presence. And then, the memory of seeing her with another man, happy and content, pierced my heart like a dagger. It was a sight that haunted me every single day.
I tried to push those thoughts away, but they kept coming back. The pain was too much to handle. I had to keep moving, keep walking, anything to keep my mind occupied. But it was no use. Everywhere I looked, I was reminded of her. Every couple, every family, every happy face brought back memories of what I had lost.
I felt a lump in my throat. I had made a decision to leave everything behind, to start anew in a different country. But here I was, back in the place that held so many memories, both beautiful and painful.
The anxiety was overwhelming. I took deep breaths, trying to calm myself. I couldn't let these emotions get the best of me. I had to be strong, for my father's sake. He needed me, and I couldn't let him down.
I really hadn't wanted to come back, but yesterday, while I was studying a report in my study room, my phone rang. It was my dad. I picked it up.
"Assalamualaikum, Dad. How are you?"
"Walaikumusalam, my son. I am good. How are you?"
"I'm good, Dad. How's Afiya?"
"She's also good. Well, I called to inform you that I booked your ticket for India tomorrow."
I was shocked.
"But why so suddenly? Is everything alright, Dad?"
"Son, everything is fine. Now just start packing your bags because your flight is at 7 AM."
"But why, Dad? I told you already I don't want to come to India ever again. Please don't start this."
"Stop your nonsense. I already booked your ticket and you are coming tomorrow. It's final."
I knew what he wanted. He wanted me to come back and marry the girl he had chosen for me. But I didn't want to marry.
"No, I'm sorry, Dad, but I will not come."
"I'm not asking your permission. I said you will come, and you will have to come."
I didn't want to come.
"This is my life, for God's sake, Dad!" My voice rose, trembling with frustration. I was not ready to return and face everything, especially her with someone else.
Dad didn't respond, and silence filled the line. Shame washed over me.
"I'm sorry, Dad. It's just—"
"If you don't come tomorrow, then don't bother coming to my funeral either."
With that, he disconnected the call.
My father’s words echoed in my ears as I waited impatiently at the airport. Where was the driver?
My phone rang, and I picked it up instantly.
"Assalamualaikum, Bhai. Where are you? Your phone was unreachable."
"Walaikumsalam, I'm at the airport."
"Which airport?"
"Mumbai."
"Seriously? You're here?"
"Yeah, I'm here."
"You don't know how happy Dad will be to see you."
"I know," I said, still feeling the shame of my behavior. His last words still haunted me.
"Well, did you buy that dress I told you to get?"
Shit. I had forgotten. She’d kill me if she knew.
"Yeah, how could I forget?" I lied.
"Thank God. Now come fast, I want to see it," she said excitedly.
"Okay, I'm coming." I cut the call and hailed a cab, realizing my driver might never arrive.
I directed the cab driver to take me to Infiniti Mall. I called my driver and told him to meet me there.
I bought several dresses for her as compensation, hoping she would understand. My driver finally arrived, and we headed home.
As I reached home, I fought back my emotions and went directly to my dad’s room. He was sitting in his armchair with his eyes closed. I approached him quietly and placed my palm over his eyes.
He smiled instantly and said,
"Welcome back home, my son."
Hearing his voice, I lost control of my emotions. I hugged him tightly, and he hugged me back, gently caressing my head. I missed him so much.
"I missed you, Dad. I missed you so much, and I'm really sorry for yesterday."
"It's okay, my son. I'm glad you returned," he said. I could feel his happiness in his smile.
After that, I met Afiya, and we all had lunch together.
After lunch, I handed Afiya all the dresses and confessed the truth. I expected her to be angry, but she thanked me for all the dresses I bought. My little sister wasn't so little anymore.
I was about to rest when Dad told me we had to attend a party tonight. I wasn’t in the mood for a party, but I agreed. I didn't want to hurt him again.
After a short but refreshing two-hour nap, I took a shower and opened my cupboard to find a suit for the evening. Someone knocked on the door.
"Come in!"
"Sir, this dress was sent by Bade Sahab (Master). He wants you to wear this."
I nodded. He placed the outfit on the bed and left. I put it on, combed my hair, sprayed some Itr (perfume), and wore my watch. I glanced at myself in the mirror.
The outfit was a three-piece suit in royal blue with white chinos. I was ready, but I couldn't shake the feeling that something was off. Dad had called me back on such short notice, and now this sudden party.
I was sure he wanted me to meet the girl he had chosen for me. But I wasn't ready for marriage.
Oh, really? Don't be shy, man. I know you’re still waiting for her.
My inner voice taunted.
No, I never waited for her. She’s happy with someone else, and I am happy with my life.
Oh, is that so?
Of course it is, I told my inner voice, trying to build up my self-esteem.
Okay, then marry the girl your father chooses for you.
My heart sank at the thought.
I’m telling you, you’re still waiting for her.
No, I’m not waiting for anyone. It's enough now. I will meet the girl Dad has chosen for me, I said with determination.
Let's see.